Change is Slow.

It has only been about 36 hours since I tried to kick my rear in gear. Change is slow. I need to be okay with that. B and I ended up eating out for lunch yesterday while running an errand. But lunches were already packed and ready to go for today. B has been very stressed because he is taking the GRE today. Hopefully once that is over we can get things back on track. I know he needs to work on school work too.

We have a leaking toilet that needs to be addressed...as in leaking from the bottom, which doesn't sound good. Also I think the house smells. I can't wait to throw open the windows this evening and all weekend and just give everything a good scrub down. I think we will buy a new vacuum this weekend. The expense seems a little odd when I am trying to save money, but the last time I used our 6 year old one it started smoking....and I hate it. I have been having trouble breathing lately and I think a really deep clean will help me feel better.

Motivation is my problem. Last night for example I was SO tired and had to take my inhaler again. B went back into work for overtime so I was left alone to care for the wee one. He wore me out. Then once I put X to bed I couldn't get started. I would flit from room to room. Walk in the kitchen....the pile by the pantry is suck a heap of canned goods and things we bought at Ikea I can't even walk over there. Then walk into the bedroom. It depressed me too....giant heap of clean laundry in a basket. Walk back into the kitchen to get a drink....sink FULL of dirty dishes. We really haven't started the taking turns idea of taking care of various chores around the house yet because the dishes still have not been done from B's first "turn". So then I go to the office. It is also a giant heap. So I start picking things up, but really 25% of the stuff is desk stuff that is sitting on or under the desk, 25% is clothing that I picked up and put away. The other 50% is miscellaneous JUNK. Some I can put away, but most of it is crap that B is storing which needs to go elsewhere. Honestly if the Bag of goodwill clothing, the 2 boxes of books, and boxes of old telephones and speakers were gone it would look like a normal room. Yes the bookcase would still need organized and the giant pile of pillows and blankets need a home to live in. It is a tiny bit cleaner and I did manage to clean a box of candle holders. Most of the pillar candles that when with the holders are so covered with soot from the fireplace in the last apartment that they were not salvageable in any form that resembled a candle.

I am trying to decide when to move X's bedroom. We know that eventually the office will be his room (and hopefully baby #2's as well) and his room will become the office, as long as we can find some way to fit a bed/ futon in the office. It is a small room so arranging furniture is tough. I really thing the best thing would be to wait until we can put a wardrobe in the bedroom, that my clothing can go in. That would free up an entire closet so many of the things out in the office could be put away in the closet once we switch rooms.