August flew by in a swirl of busyness and sickness. X had an ear infection and ended up at home for 4 days. Then I was sick for over a week. All of my goals and plans never came to fruition. I did manage to have a yard sale, B ran his first race, and X's birthday was a success. Then we went on vacation last weekend. We have not had a weekend free since the beginning of August. My little sister J is having freshman roommate drama so she is coming to stay this weekend.
Maybe I am going about this all the wrong way, expecting everything at once. Though everything goes through my head at once. What is that I hope to achieve? How long until I reach that goal? What do I need to do to get there? There are SO many things where do I begin?
1) I want to be organized and put together. Both at home and work. Currently the house is a disaster, my desk at work is a mess and I look like a 45 year old woman, and I am not quite 28.
2) I want to be able to focus on what I am doing not worrying about every other task in my head. Sitting and writing this is hard because I have 10 other ideas of things I want to do.
3) I want to improve myself. Not only be more put together and look better, but to put time into what I enjoy. I would like to explore my faith/ beliefs, work on scrapbooks, get back into cooking, and maybe find some type of exercise that makes me have more energy
4) I want to save more, spend less and not feel deprived. I am trying very hard to reduce our frivolous spending so we can pay off bills and live the life we want. I really need to sit down with B and discuss this with him.
5) I want to be more on the ball at work. I lack focus and tend to get side tracked. Luckily due to some situations at work, things are slow. I feel like I am just sliding by. Needing to find a new job may still be a very real possibility in the next year. I have slacked since getting pregnant. Perhaps feeling accomplished at work will give me the energy I need to stay motivated in the evenings.
6) B and I need to find time for each other. He has been very affectionate and sweet lately. It has been nice. I still find myself trying to find reasons to be angry with him. That is not good.
There are so many other things, but this is probably more than enough to start with.
I have 2 choices. Things can stay the same or they can change. I am giving myself until Christmas. That is a little over 100 days. So how do I begin? I tend to like to jump in head first, but we can see how well that works. Though baby steps I see no progress and get frustrated and give up.